A Journey of Understanding Trauma and Healing my Inner Child
We accept the love we think we deserve. —Stephen Chbosky
I have recently pondered a very sad memory. My son played hockey for years.
I am the type of person to let people be. I am a very quiet person, and I trust a few. I am an observer. One time I was at the rink. There was a mother with her little 3-year-old child. The mother was very overweight, loud and opinionated. Continue reading “Getting beyond the lies. You are worthy.”
I haven’t written a blog post on attachment and how important it is. I have written about the “Attachment Theory” in my book, My Courage to Tell.
It’s an important piece of study. And probably the most important thing that we need to know. Why? A child needs to attach to feel secure. The less attachment, the more insecure a child feels. Continue reading “The Heroes | The Ones that Help the Children”
If you are reading this, you may be interested in what CD and ODD are. First I want to very clear; I do not know if anyone in my family has a “disorder”. There has not been a diagnosis and I am not a psychologist or psychiatrist who can make these determinations.
Do I have my own suppositions? Yes. I certainly do. And I do not talk about those publically. I do talk about concerning behaviours that I have witnessed. And I leave each individual to make their own determination. We are all entitled to our own opinions. Continue reading “What is Conduct Disorder and Oppositional Defiant Disorder?”
As most of you know from following me and my blog, I have been dealing with C-PTSD, anxiety and panic attacks as a result of dealing with old buried trauma from my childhood. I am working through deep-rooted trauma from years ago.
So along with that, I need to realize that there are many changes going on in my life. When things go wrong, I start to feel anxiety and panic. Continue reading “Trauma from Childhood: It’s a Slow Process”
Ok, I don’t know why it is that we minimize our abuse. It is an interesting phenomenon.
I have written my book on bullying and psychological abuse. I met with psychologists who told me how important it was to tell my story.
I had learned that psychological abuse had long-term effects. I was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder because of it. (It is actually Complex-PTSD, but it is not in the diagnostic manual. I have explained this in my book.) Continue reading “Why do we minimize our abuse?”
It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.
—Frederick Douglass
It’s harmful.
It is an invisible abuse.
Something not often talked about. But now science is telling us that it is just as harmful as physical abuse.
Oh yes—I think we need to listen to the medical professionals and experts in this field.
I like to research. And for many years I had no idea how this hidden abuse could be so harmful to people.
Dr. Jonice Webb, author of Running on Empty No More states, “emotional neglect is the silent killer of a child’s spirit.” She also has said that children are born pre-wired with some very specific emotional needs. Dr. Webb has stated in her article, 7 Signs You Grew Up With Childhood Emotional Neglect, “Childhood Emotional Neglect is both simple in its definition and powerful in its effects. It happens when your parents fail to respond enough to your emotional needs while they’re raising you.”
That’s simple enough for me. I had one parent laugh while I was bullied and another who offered no protection because it was always, “You kids stop this nonsense.” Continue reading “Childhood emotional neglect (CEN)— harmful as physical abuse!”
Before you read this post, I am going to tell you up front – it may be triggering. This is a story about physical abuse and emotional abuse.
I was tickle tortured. Until I cried. When I complained, I was laughed at. I recently read a post (1988) by Ann Landers. She stated, “I have dealt with this problem before, but tickling is such a well-disguised form of torture that I feel it should be unmasked periodically. Tickling is NOT, repeat NOT, harmless fun. It is a subtle form of sadism.” Continue reading “Tickle Torture”
To those who abuse: the sin is yours, the crime is yours and the shame is yours. To those who protect the perpetrators: blaming the victim only masks the evil within, making you as guilty as those who abuse. Stand up for the innocent or go down with the rest.
—Flora Jessop
Choosing to stay silent, is a choice. And it is not a good choice when it comes to witnessing bullying and abuse. It is abuse in an of itself.
Winston Churchill, the man who stood up to evil itself, Adolf Hitler in WWII, said, “You’ve got enemies, good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.”
I had people in my life that chose to witness the abuse—and chose to ignore it. Enable it. It continues to this day. But I will not stand for it! Continue reading “Letter to my abuser”
The recent headline of the article posted in The Guardian stated: “How childhood stress can knock 20 years off your life.”
Anyone who has experienced childhood abuse and neglect might want to know how it can affect them later on in life. The CDC-Kaiser Permanente Adverse Childhood Experiences Study2 is one of the largest examinations on child abuse and neglect. Continue reading “Adverse Childhood Experiences”
Science! Brain scans!
This is all is very interesting to me. Studies now show how lying begins early and I get that! I was a victim of “lies” upon “lies” when I was a child. It made me feel like I was going insane.
We all tell little white lies. I watched a seven-minute video interview with Dr. Phil and Megan Kelly on lying (below). We all lie. But what about the manipulative liars? What about the people that deliberately lie?
Every parent needs to know that a child’s brain is developing until they are six years old. Now science is showing how the brain adapts to the lying. There has been a large body of research to back this up, and I recently saw a study called “The brain adapts to dishonesty“. Continue reading “Have you met a person who can’t stop lying?”
